Let me start off by saying that I am a huge roller coaster snob. I have been on them all and been riding them since I turned 11. My dad threw me on the Revolution at Magic Mountain when I was so skinny I could have literally slipped out from under the safety bar. Ever since I got off that ride–laughing my head off, sweaty and excited–I knew that I had found a hobby I would have for life.
Recently I was at Disney California Adventure Park. It was the typical day of trying to squeeze in rides I actually want to go on, while making sure that my three young sons get to see the same shows and ride the same rides for the 417th time. My wife had jumped on the grenade and taken the boys to the Disney Junior-Live on Stage! show. I went to get in line to ride the new Little Mermaid attraction, because it is not at all creepy for a 37-year-old man to get in line, alone, for the Little Mermaid. I assured everyone around me that my wife and kids were on their way. Then I heard someone in line say, “ We just went on California Screamin’, and there was like no line.”
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| Photo provided by the Disneyland Resort |
Since I knew that my family was still over 30 minutes away, and I was beginning to draw suspicion from the families around me, I decided to jump out of line and head over to this “roller coaster” I have seen for years, but refused to ride because I, in my best guess, knew it would be terrible.
I got there, and there was a five-minute wait. I thought this is great, I can ride this stinker and still get back into line without my wife ever knowing that I blew off my assignment. As I walked briskly to the loading chute and awaited the next train to come in, I saw the train on the other side come in and people were like “woo-hoo that was great,” ( maybe they didn’t actually say “woo-hoo”) and I knew that the ride would be lame…because I just know these things.
I got on the train, the Cast Member asked if I had my safety bar down and could I pull up on it. I scowled at her. Apparently she could not see in my face that I clearly knew what I was doing. But just to be safe I checked. Then we were off. Then we stopped. Wait what is this? A launch start? Like one of my favorite rides is Montezuma’s Revenge at Knotts Berry Farm? Like 0-60 in 3 seconds from a stand still?
Then we launched, and it was good. Up the first hill and a small smile crept across my face. Up and down and twists and turns. So fast and so smooth. Then when I was perfectly happy to be on this ride, I saw it coming towards me. A LOOP! I had no idea this ride, that I had mocked for years had a loop. Going through the loop I turned my head to the side (that is what you do so your head is not pressed forward and so you can see the park spin) and then…we wrapped it up. As we pulled into the station, I was smiling and let out a woo-hoo so the kid next to me could think me lamer than he already had. (During the ride I yelled out “ hey kid, put your hands up it makes the ride more fun!”)
As I exited the ride and headed back to Mermaid, I wished I had not been so judgmental of this really great roller coaster. I had missed out on riding one of my new favorites because I knew it would not be any good. I got back in line for Mermaid, alone again, but now I had a big goofy grin and wind swept hair, so I really made all of the parents uncomfortable. Finally my wife and boys joined me and she asked how the line had been. I told her that I rode California Screamin’ and I really liked it. She said, “If you liked that, you will love this ride!”
Thirty minutes later, I told her she was wrong. So, if you have not been on the coaster at Disney California Adventure Park, I think it is well worth your time. If you really want to see plastic shell fish dancing to “Under the Sea,” then Ariel’s Under Sea Adventure is definitely for you. Just know that if you are an older male and by yourself, you will get some looks.
Will is a television producer who among his credits is known for making up crazy and outlandish games on shows like “I Survived a Japanese Game Show” and “Minute To Win It.”
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What a way to tell a story! I so hope you’ll write again!
Can’t wait to make it to Disneyland to check that bad boy out… and I do mean the roller coaster 😉
Love the review! I’m going to have to do the sideways head thing when going through the loop. I’ve never heard of that before.
Very cool Lisa…love the post by Will…but, Will, have you ever been to Cedar Point? THIS will make you a roller coaster snob. Glad you enjoyed….will check it out next time.
What a funny post! I now want to hear what Will thinks of other attractions! Keep ’em coming! 🙂
Great post! I can’t wait to ride California Screamin’ but I am also looking forward to The Little Mermaid. 🙂
This is a refreshing Disney blog perspective! (It is eerily similar to what i hear at home…) Thanks for keeping it real Will 😀
Ha! Loved the post :).
Love it, Will.